Just Typical Remmie
by Akira Ichijouji
Summary: It's fluffy...it's cute...However, it's not off the pages of a sappy Muggle romance novel...it's MWPP Sirius and Remus! The summary doesn't do it justice. SLASH.


A/N: I sat down to write this with no thought out plot, no ideas, no preconceived anything. It seems like that is the formula for my best fics, as I really like how this one turned out. Sirius and Remus just make me feel all squishy inside. ^_^  
  
By the way, this is set in the golden MWPP days, before the dark times, before +Voldemort+. (You get an oversized chocolate-chip cookie if you can identify that altered quote. ^_~)  
  
Warnings: Slash. Moony pining over Padfoot (who is being a typical non-observant git). Use of the "d"-word and the h-e-double-hockey-sticks word (hehe). In other words, no profanity you wouldn't get from reading the Bible. *snicker*  
  
  
  
Just Typical Remmie  
by Akira Ichijouji  
/:\:/\:/\:/\:/\:/\:/:\  
  
  
Sirius could barely hear the very-muffled sobs coming from behind the curtains on Remus' bed, and in truth he wasn't sure they were sobs at all. The black-haired boy looked up from his studying -- books and parchment were strewn over his bed and onto his night table and some onto the floor, and as he shifted slightly, another book slid ungracefully down the side of the covers.  
  
"Bloody hell," he muttered, glancing over at Remus' bed again.  
  
The curtains were drawn and shaking slightly at the barely-audible draw of every breath coming from the other boy.  
  
Sirius was now sure that they were indeed sobs.  
  
It had happened before -- Remus would sink so low in his depression and miserable sense of self-worth that he would resort to hidden tears behind the barricade of red velvet.  
  
There was nothing else to do but see what was the matter.  
  
Sirius put down the parchment he had been writing his Herbology essay on -- quite a boring topic anyway, something about the medicinal and magical value of certain strains of fungi which could only be found in southern Wales.  
  
Time for a break.  
  
Sirius sighed and stretched his stiff back. Moony could be so ridiculous sometimes. He knew that Padfoot and Wormtail and Prongs loved him as much as they did each other, but most of the time it seemed he didn't. The werewolf was so used to public scorn and life without friends that he hardly believed he had them.  
  
"Typical Remmie," Sirius muttered, slipping off the bed and sending three more books to the floor as he did so.  
  
Sirius strode purposefully over to Remus' bed, pulling back the curtains in one swift motion of the arm. Remus stared up at him, eyes wide and teary.  
  
"Padfoot! I..." He looked down, eyes out of sight. "Go away."  
  
"No." Sirius sat down on the bed and drew the curtains back. "I heard you crying. What's wrong?"  
  
Remus glared balefully at his wand. "Stupid silencing spell. I knew it was a sham."  
  
"Well, I didn't hear you very +well+..."  
  
Remus stared off into the space Sirius was +not+ occupying. He mournfully fingered the cover of the book in his lap -- the very same one that had made him cry in the first place -- as the wet and shining paths of tears dried silently on his face.  
  
"So Moony..." Sirius fidgeted, "So Moony, why were you crying?"  
  
Remus twitched. There was no way in the burning depths of Hell he was going to tell Sirius. Sirius wouldn't understand how deeply the book had touched him...How it had stuck a nerve...a young girl, crying for her long-lost and unrequited love...  
  
It was an awful book. "Hardly great literature," his mum would have said scathingly. It had an overused plot, cliche and two-dimensional characters, and scenes that were set up so obviously you would have to be an idiot not to notice them.  
  
Remus kept reading it, though -- he didn't know why.  
  
Yes he did. It was because the book stuck a chord within him, and he sympathized with the heroine's plight because he too was in the exact same situation.  
  
Unrequited love -- hmm. Typical Remmie. Typical Remmie to get so moony over someone so close but out of reach...Moony. Ha.  
  
Remus gave an ironic snicker. "No pun intended," he muttered.  
  
"What did you say?" Sirius was close to him now, so close.  
  
"N-Nothing," Remus replied softly, still unable to look Sirius in the eye. In his shattered state the grey-eyed boy knew he wouldn't be able to stare into their oceanic depths and look away lightly.  
  
Remus felt a tug on his hand, and realized that Sirius had taken the book and was flipping through it.  
  
"Oy! Padfoot, give that back!" Remus made a futile grab for his book.  
  
"Is this what made you cry?" Sirius asked tenderly, a concerned look on his face.  
  
The werewolf stammered. "N-No...I m-mean, y-yes...I-I mean..." Padfoot had an uncanny way of being able to tell exactly what was wrong with someone, whether physically or emotionally.  
  
Sirius studied the book thoughtfully, reading the summary on the inside flap.  
  
"You're in love with someone, and they don't love you back, is that it?"  
  
Remus was floored. He looked up in shock, meeting Sirius' eyes for the first time. Mouth gaping slightly, he stopped his nearly-incoherent babbling. "H-how..." The brown-haired boy fell silent.  
  
"I just know, is all. The book was clear enough. Who is it?"  
  
Remus said nothing, and looked away.  
  
"You don't want to tell me, because you think I'm going to tell them?"  
  
Remus still said nothing.  
  
"You know me better than that, Moony. I would never tell one of your secrets."  
  
Silence.  
  
"I may be able to help..."  
  
Remus' finger twitched slightly as it rested on his knee.  
  
"Do I know the person?"  
  
"Maybe," Remus said softly, staring anywhere but at Sirius. *Oh the horrible, excruciating irony...*  
  
No matter how adept Sirius was at knowing other people's feelings, he was terribly dense about them when it came to someone being in love with +him+. It just never even occurred to the black-haired boy that someone could care for him in that way. He was one of those people who counted everybody in the room and came up short because he forgot to count himself.  
  
*And that's why I love him,* Remus thought savagely. *Don't ever change, Padfoot.*  
  
"Will you tell me by the end of the year?" Sirius asked softly, returning the book to Remus' lap.  
  
"Maybe," Remus said just as softly, avoiding the intensity of that blue-black gaze.  
  
Sirius nodded, gently smoothing the hair that had stubbornly refused to stay in a ponytail away from Remus' face.  
  
*He doesn't know. He doesn't know how he torments me when he gives me that look, with that little half smile like I'm the only person in the entire world...*  
  
Sirius smiled as Remus blushed slightly. *Why is it so embarrassing for him? He knows me well enough...He knows I would never tell anyone else.*  
  
*Except maybe Prongs.*  
  
Oh. Prongs.  
  
Sirius and James were inseparable. Quidditch practice was the only time you would ever see one without the other, and telling Sirius anything was like telling James too.  
  
What if Moony was in love with Prongs? It would explain a lot, why Remus would go out of his way to talk to James, almost forgetting that Sirius was there? It would also explain the whole "unrequited love" bit, because James and Lily Evans had been dating for nearly a year now and practically all he saw was her?  
  
Sirius decided not to mention his theory. "I won't tell Prongs, if that's what you're worried about."  
  
"Why would I be worried about that?" Remus snapped quietly, wishing but not wishing that Sirius would leave him alone.  
  
Oh. Theory Number One -- shot down. It had to be someone close to them -- Remus wouldn't be so uptight about telling him if it was someone he didn't know well.  
  
"So...it's not Prongs then?"  
  
Remus looked decidedly weirded out.  
  
"It's not Lily, is it?"  
  
Remus glared.  
  
"Um, let's see...Wormtail?"  
  
Remus looked bemused and a bit incredulous.  
  
"Kitty?"  
  
"..."  
  
"Cynthia?"  
  
"..."  
  
"Erin?"  
  
"..."  
  
Sirius went through all the Gryffindors in their year, getting silence in response to all of them. Had to be someone older, younger, or in a different House.  
  
Oh, no, not...  
  
"Lucius Malfoy?"  
  
Remus' eyes went wide. "No!"  
  
Well, at least he got a response on that one. "Severus Snape?"  
  
"DEAR GOD NO!" Remus looked shaken.  
  
"Sorry, sorry!" Sirius thought for a moment. "Bill Weasely?"  
  
Remus looked at him strangely from the corner of one eye.  
  
"Is it a professor?"   
  
What the...? "No, it's not a professor!"  
  
Sirius looked put out. "Well I don't know...it doesn't seem to be anyone else we know and for one Professor McGonagall is pretty..."  
  
Remus rolled his eyes. *Padfoot, you big, stupid git.*  
  
Sirius thought some more.  
  
Wait...Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh god. It couldn't be...  
  
"Me...?" Sirius said hesitatingly.  
  
Remus stiffened and opened his book, thrusting his nose into it once again. Sirius could see the tips of his ears turning red. "Go away. You're an awful guesser, and I'm reading."  
  
Sirius retreated from the velvet haven in shock.  
  
Never in his strangest and most bizarre dreams had it ever crossed his mind that Remus could be in love with...him?  
  
"Not possible," Sirius muttered to himself. "Moony's just put out by my bothering him when he was reading...He was blushing because the idea's so weird...That's it...That's all it is..."  
  
Sirius paced back and forth, trying to convince himself this. However...  
  
...something was beginning to stir in the black-haired boy, something nascent and...cozy. Sirius and Remus. Moony and Padfoot. They...sounded good together.  
  
And Sirius knew this was something he could never tell James.  
  
  
As soon as Sirius left, Remus slid down and stuffed a pillow over his face. The thrill of shock and fear that had dropped suddenly from his belly had not dissipated yet, and was still causing a cold sweat to break out on his face in sharp counterpoint to the way he was madly blushing.  
  
"Oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god..." he whispered into the squishy, comfortable weight above his face.  
  
*He knows. He +knows+. He +KNOWS+.*  
  
Remus calmed his breathing somewhat.  
  
*Even Padfoot isn't that big of a moron.*  
  
And the expression of shock and wide-eyed horror he saw on Sirius' face right before he buried his face in the book was enough to cause Remus to despair of their friendship surviving this, much less of them ever "getting together".  
  
Perhaps our dear Moony had misinterpreted said expression, for Sirius, as he paced back and forth, was having a hard time not grinning as he thought about the smaller boy. *Remmie, you stupid git, how could you think I wouldn't have feelings for you?*  
  
The thought had echoed around Sirius' mind before he could stop it and turn it into something else.  
  
*have feelings for you*  
  
Of course he did, how could he not? Remus was small and skinny and vulnerable, with dusty brown hair which was always tied back with a burgundy ribbon and light, slate-grey eyes. His skin was lightly tanned, with a dusky brown overtone which reminded Sirius of wild things and uncontrollable moonlight. He had an uncharacteristic interest in Muggle romance novels, a love for DADA class and patched, secondhand robes. His voice was a medium tenor and his laugh was high like bells tolling on a holiday. His sense of humor was sarcastic and often twisted, sending Padfoot and Prongs and Wormtail into fits of laughter. Remus talked in his sleep when he was worried about something. Remus hated tomatoes and always pushed them to the side of his plate when they were in a salad. Remus was scared of wasps. Remus loved chocolate. Remus slept with his pillow sideways, his neck curving down and his arms around it. Remus was a werewolf, and beyond all bounds that made Sirius' deep affection for him stronger.  
  
*You're not the stupid git, Moony, I am.*  
  
Half an hour passed, and Sirius was getting more and more used to the idea.  
  
An hour passed, and Sirius was feeling like more and more of an idiot for not noticing his +own+ feelings.  
  
An hour and forty-five minutes passed, and Sirius was sure he was in love.  
  
Two hours passed, and Sirius was trying to work on homework, but he just couldn't concentrate past the fantasies sweetly plaguing his mind.  
  
The Animagus tossed the book he was trying to read across the bed, causing an entire pile of potions homework to slide off, again. He flicked his quill at the opposite wall, but it only traveled a foot or so before falling back to the bed and making a large ink-stain on the coverlet.  
  
Sirius glared at the offending spot, then pushed himself off the bed to go stand by Remus'.  
  
He decided not to think about it anymore.  
  
He parted the curtains and jumped onto the bed, changing into a big shaggy dog on the way down.  
  
Padfoot stood on Remus' bed, panting, nudging the pillow that was still over the boy's face with a wet nose.  
  
Remus had fallen asleep nearly an hour and a half ago, and it took him a moment to wake up and notice the strange weight change on his bed. He slowly removed the pillow as something touched the red, tasseled fabric.  
  
"Oh, for crying out loud! Padfoot, you're going to get fur all over my bed!"  
  
The dog just stared at him, still panting.  
  
"Fine, fine, what the hell." Remus patted Padfoot on the head bemusedly. The dog pushed into his hand, wanting to be petted. The brown-haired boy rolled his eyes, a smile pulling at the side of his mouth. He always had a soft spot for animals, even if one happened to be his best friend in animagus form.  
  
Remus scratched behind Padfoot's ear, still distracted, then grabbed the furry nose between his hands, petting and roughly rubbing the fur backwards.  
  
Padfoot growled playfully, baring his teeth. The black dog pounced on Remus, knocking him back onto the bed, paws placed on his shoulders. Remus laughed, and Padfoot privately thought that he had never seen such a lovely sight.  
  
But he was here to cheer Remus up, and unexpectedly turning into his animagus form had always done the trick.  
  
Padfoot seemed to grin, and he licked a huge swath up the side of Remus' face.  
  
"Eeewww!!! Padfoot!!! Yuck!!!" Remus giggled, then couldn't stop laughing.  
  
*Well good. He's not thinking about anything to make him depressed. Mission accomplished.*  
  
Remus began to pat Padfoot again, and the shaggy black dog took his paws off Remus' chest so he could roll over and have his tummy scratched.  
  
Remus grinned affectionately, finding the exact spot that would cause the dog's leg to twitch involuntarily. Padfoot whined appreciatively, squirming under Remus' ministrations.  
  
*Damn. Love it when he does that. Being a dog has its perks.*  
  
After a while, the grey-eyed boy's petting slowed, and he flopped back onto the pillows. Padfoot rolled back onto his side, furry head on the pillow next to Remus'. The boy scratched the dog behind the ear again, then let his arm drape over the animagus, rubbing the black fur with small motions of his hand.  
  
Moony grinned, then was serious.  
  
"So...you know, don't you? Who I'm in love with?" Remus' voice was steadier than he felt.  
  
The dog nodded.  
  
"Figures." Remus looked down, down from the dog's black, intelligent stare. "You're so much easier to talk to when you're a dog," Remus sighed, snuggling up to the black form taking up most of his bed.  
  
"Yeah, but I can't talk back," Sirius said after he changed forms. Remus made as if to move away, but Sirius held him still with one hand against his back.  
  
"Why don't you pet me more often? I like that," Sirius said seriously, blue eyes blinking very close to Remus' own. "And how do you find that spot that makes my leg kick? I wonder if I still have that when I'm human..."  
  
This had the desired effect of truly embarrassing Remus, and he blushed madly from ears to neck.  
  
Sirius was grinning like a madman, biting his lip to keep it from looking too...insane.  
  
"Sirius, you're being ridiculous."  
  
Sirius' smile faded. Moony used his real name. Moony used his real name. +Moony used his real name+.  
  
Either Remus was mad at him or he had completely misjudged the other boy's reaction from earlier.  
  
*Uh oh,* Sirius thought, suddenly panicked.  
  
"Sirius..." the brown-haired boy breathed, longingly, and suddenly hearing his real name from those lips was the most beautiful sound imaginable. Suddenly Remus' face darkened.  
  
"I can't take it, Sirius, you teasing me like this! Every time you look at me there's this bit of affection -- damn it, nearly undying devotion -- in your eyes that makes me feel like you love me...but then you go back to talking with Prongs like nothing's happened and now you're making it worse because I know you can't actually love me like that..." Remus' voice broke. "...Nobody can."  
  
Sirius' grin came back, but this time, instead of a manic gleam in his eyes, there was that same look of "undying devotion" Remus had mentioned before.  
  
"Hmm, I have several options here...One, pretend like this is a sappy romance novel and tell you how much you're wrong, and how much I love you, but I think I'll go with option two, which is 'Remus, you wanker, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.'" Sirius hesitated, then pressed his lips lightly to the ones before him. They were soft...and sweet...and moved gently under his. After the longest moment in recorded history, the black-haired boy pulled back.  
  
"Last time I checked, you were the sweetest, most gorgeous, most quirky and most adorable person ever. How could anyone +not+ love you?"  
  
Remus spluttered. "I...I...I...I...I..."  
  
"Oh, Remmie, you git, just typical. You don't have to say anything." Sirius smiled. "I understand."  
  
And he did.  
  
  
/:\:/\:/\:/\:/\:/\:/:\  
*swish and flick*  
Finitum! 


End file.
